Tired

THE ADDED PM PORTION

So this evening I just sat up in my room; something I haven't done a while, and just sobbed. I sobbed pretty hard and for a pretty long time. Then I finally texted the best of the best like always because I've been practicing the whole not bottling up thing and spilled to her. I let her know that I've been upset about a lot of things and to be honest, I've come to realize that even though a lot of the things I were upset with were to do with other people, the truth is a lot of those things that those people have done to dissapoint me could've been prevented if only I had seen it coming; if only I had not been so naive and had been realistic. I shouldn't have been so naive to trust and open up so easily. I should've taken care of myself before having done all that I've done for and with other people. I really need to forgive myself for a lot of things and I really need to start loving me and all of me without condemning myself for my mistakes in the past because the fact of the matter is that was my past and that's where all those flaws and mistakes belong, not here in the present and that's just that. So now all I can do is just spend a lot of time alone to continue to rebuild myself and my self independence. I was getting a long just fine until you came back. I shouldn't have let you come in the way of my work in progress and all the plans I had for myself and I'm sorry that I ever did, but what's important now is that now I know. So I won't make that mistake again.

PS - MADD LOVE, TIN


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THE AM PORTION

It's a 2 way street and I'm afraid that I can't be on both ends at the same time anymore. I don't know how I was doing it before, but I'm extremely tired of it. So I'm sorry, but it's up to you now because quite frankly I'm tired and am no longer willing to do not only my part, but yours as well.



Damn... I don't even know why I bother..